I went to a BBQ, and Fought with a Mini. 

"64Mali" (ctaaffe64) 06/15/2015 at 09:33 • Filed to: None

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So this Saturday was a BBQ for the local Mazda club (NEMAC), I went expecting some food, maybe use of the pool and to do no work on a car. Boy was I wrong.....

This is not going to be a short post.

First a tiny bit of back story, the Mini was parked in 2013 at the house while the owner originally was being deployed, 6 months turned into 18 months and one very bad Massachusetts winter. So it sat, when I arrived my friend had already spent time changing the battery (PITA) and getting it to move. Well the rear passenger caliper was stuck left a 20’ skid mark. I arrived and being the bringer of an impact wrench I got roped into looking at it. At least my supervisor was cute.

So turned out all the grease on the caliper pins had dried up, no big deal off to Autozone we go to get some. Come back, grease it up, and the piston is too far out to get the caliper back on over the rotor. NBD well just compress it... But wait its a Mini and needs to be spun while it is compressed, back to Autozone to try and rent the tool. They don’t have it or one to buy, so giant C-Clamp and twisting with pliers it is. Caliper now goes on over the rotor, great, lower caliper pin threads in, upper caliper pin does not.... Take the caliper off attempt to thread in by hand, and the pin is going completely sideways. It was cross threaded, I guess that is why it did not come out easy. Best guess is the last BMW place cross threaded it on the way in and just hoped no one would notice.

OK. We will just go back to Autozone and grab a Metric Tap/Die kit since everyone needs one of those anyways. Bolt seems to be a M10 X 1.25 and its included in the kit according to the box. Get back to the driveway open up the kit and...... there are TWO M10 X 1.5 and Zero(0) M10 X 1.25 taps. All right time to laugh and go back to Autozone (Trip 4) to swap out the kit for a new one. Get to Autozone they have one other kit on the shelf buttttt... It had been opened and returned. All the taps inside were perfect and unused Except the M10 X 1.25 which was destroyed. No single taps on the shelf we head off to Home Depot.

Well I guess that M10 X 1.25 isn’t that common as Home Depot didn’t have one so we find the nearest other car store NAPA and head on down. Thankfully they have the tap and we make it back to the driveway 45 min later.

Well wouldn’t you know it. the threads are so munged and the angle of a bracket on a car, the tap wont go in to chase the threads. So with a little outside the box thinking I take the M8 X 1.25 thread it in and wobble it out a few times to chase the threads and magically that works.
Put the damn car back together, trip getting up and twist my knee pretty badly but the Mini goes to drive off..... and then runs out of coolant. Have I mentioned I hate Minis now.
And now the worst part. There was no food, and the pool wasn’t ready, But at least a few cars showed up. The person with the blacked out car doesn’t want internet pics until later. So 3rd grade Photoshop level edit it is.

And I got the new decal for my Fiesta

For the TL ; DR crowd. Went to a BBQ that wasn’t a BBQ, spent 5 hours trying to fix a rear caliper on a Mini Cooper. Did many part store runs, went home and grilled ribs.

CalzoneGolem > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 09:40

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Seems much bigger to me.

TwinCharged - Is Now UK Opponaut > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 09:51

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That’s what you get if you leave a BMW sitting - immeasurably frustrating repairs. Those MINIs need to be driven :’)

Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 09:53

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You know, being handy with a car can be good and bad. At least you were able to help the service member out. But on the other hand, what’s the deal with the food? What kind of assnozzle has a BBQ/cookout, but has no food? I’m willing to spend a few hours working on something for you, but you better at least feed me, especially since that was the whole reason you were there to begin with. Hey, want to come to my pizza party? We're gonna build a fence. And not eat pizza.

64Mali > Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! 06/15/2015 at 09:56

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There was a large miscommunication with the set up of the BBQ. Thankfully my wife made and brought chicken wings. So we had some things to munch on.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 09:56

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I have 2 questions for you.

1. What kind of battery powered impact gun do you have, and how do you like it. I want one desperately but don’t want to buy a crappy one.

2. Who the fuck hosts a BBQ with no food?!

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 09:56

4

Dude, that’s a penis

64Mali > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman 06/15/2015 at 09:57

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Whoops, I did that on my phone without looking. Well its kind of my thought on the car right now.

Patrick Nichols > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 09:59

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**Redacted** Grey Market import Mazda RX-7 Spirit R

That’s my best guess given the club, but probably incorrect. Maybe an early special edition JDM miata?

64Mali > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner 06/15/2015 at 10:01

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1. http://www.homedepot.com/p/DEWALT-20-Vo… its 145 Ftlbs of torque. It some times has trouble with lug nuts but makes a great gun for everything else like suspension. I might buy the bigger one just for lugs, but its size is great.

2. The host thought it was a bring your own food Mod-Meet not a BBQ at his house.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:13

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1. I was eyeing up one of these, crazy sale right now. 200 ft lbs torque. I wonder if the extra 55 ft lbs would make it lug-nut functional.

http://www.sears.com/craftsman-c3-1…

2. I’d be hesitant to think of said host as a friend after trickery like that...

Brickman > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:13

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Darn space - time vortexes.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:14

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Awesome! Lol

64Mali > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner 06/15/2015 at 10:18

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The DeWalt ones are the same as MacTools so that is why I bought that brand.

64Mali > Patrick Nichols 06/15/2015 at 10:19

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I’m waiting for them to make their announcement then I will make a post of wtf was hidden behind a 3rd grade scribble.

Wacko > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:19

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most likely another mazda, but this one rusted away while taking the picture creating this black hole.

64Mali > Wacko 06/15/2015 at 10:23

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Its the oil from the leaking V6 obscuring it.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:23

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that is a big plus. Mac makes good stuff.

I’ve never had Craftsman fail on me, though I lot of people aren’t a big fan of them. I don’t use my tools enough/hard enough to have them fail, I think Craftsman is perfectly fine for the average DIY guy.

OPPOsaurus WRX > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:24

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where in MA are you? I’m guessing thats your kid? how old?

64Mali > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:25

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My Email hates me. This just showed up.

64Mali > OPPOsaurus WRX 06/15/2015 at 10:26

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Yeah that is my daughter Charlotte shes 1.5 Years now. And this was in Marlborough. We had one VT, and 2 CT people show up. I live in Westford.

MonkeePuzzle > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:42

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I can see why you blacked it out!!!

64Mali > MonkeePuzzle 06/15/2015 at 10:46

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Damnit you figured it out... Also no way to give you enough stars..

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 10:50

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Be proud. I’ve seen mini rear brakes defeat seasoned veterans.

64Mali > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner 06/15/2015 at 10:56

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The craftsman impact wasn’t that much less when I went looking. I have a lot of craftsman hand tools. But I like industrial quality on my power tools and DeWalt has never let me down.

64Mali > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 06/15/2015 at 10:57

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It was the not having the right tools and then a cross threaded bracket (Thanks Mini Service) that made it such a PITA. I didn’t have to change the pads or the stupid wear sensor or the rotor which save my ass since that thing was rusted on.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 11:04

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Not having the right tools is tough. But it’s exactly the things you dealt with that usually stump people, good job. I shit you not, there are “pro’s” who can’t into re-threading or rotating caliper pistons.

MrFurzzy > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 11:08

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Am I crazy, or is that a speed6?

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 11:20

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Certainly fair enough!

64Mali > MrFurzzy 06/15/2015 at 11:20

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You might still be crazy but that is a speed 6 on the left.

MrFurzzy > 64Mali 06/15/2015 at 22:14

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Awesome! That’s my favorite car!

64Mali > MrFurzzy 06/16/2015 at 09:33

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I helped put a custom FMIC on one. Sad she sold it though, they are wicked fast cars.